The Simpsons — Season 34 Episode 1
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S34E01
Habeas Tortoise
After Homer humiliates himself in a town meeting, he looks for acceptance in an internet group hunting for a missing tortoise but finds something much more sinister.
FamilyAnimationComedy
Episode
- Habeas Tortoise After Homer humiliates himself in a town meeting, he looks for acceptance in an internet group hunting for a missing tortoise but finds something much more sinister.
- One Angry Lisa Lisa gets called for jury duty while Marge becomes obsessed with her exercise bike.
- Lisa the Boy Scout When the Boy Explorers become co-ed, Bart and Lisa vow to "out scout" each other at the annual jamboree.
- The King of Nice Marge is hired as a segment producer on Krusty's new daytime talk show. But her initial excitement about the job fades when she discovers what an endless nightmare it is!
- Not It Homer and his teenaged friends are pursued by a killer clown in a spoof of Stephen King's novel "It".
- Treehouse of Horror XXXIII In a book-themed trilogy, Marge's resentment takes monstrous form, Lisa tries to save the planet through murder and Homer learns he's not the man he thought he was.
- From Beer to Paternity When Homer becomes Duffman's girl-dad hero, they go on a road trip with Lisa that threatens to expose Homer's terrible parenting.
- Step Brother from the Same Planet Homer is stunned by his feelings of rage and resentment when Grampa becomes a doting stepfather to his girlfriend's quirky young son. Lisa and Bart throw the ultimate slumber party.
- When Nelson Met Lisa A future tale of the will-they-won't-they-I-guess-they-won't-maybe-they-will of Springfield's most unlikely couple.
- Game Done Changed When Bart discovers a profitable glitch in an online game, he ropes Principal Skinner into his lucrative criminal enterprise. Marge and Maggie discover paradise.
- Top Goon Coach Moe recruits the world's greatest brawlers to teach Nelson the art of hockey goonery.
- My Life as a Vlog Through a series of YouTube recommended videos, the story of the rise and fall of The Simpson Family Vlog is revealed.
- The Many Saints of Springfield When Ned Flanders falls on hard times, Fat Tony makes him an offer he can't refuse.
- Carl Carlson Rides Again When Carl is smitten by a beautiful woman, he looks into the roots of his own identity by discovering the origins of a mysterious rodeo buckle.
- Bartless When Bart's latest prank leads to chaos at Springfield Elementary, Marge and Homer dream of a world in which their rambunctious son was never a Simpson.
- Hostile Kirk Place When Milhouse's Dad, Kirk, takes exception to a school history lesson that paints one of his ancestors in a bad light, Kirk goes on a crusade to censor and control the school curriculum -- a crusade that Homer co-opts for fun and profit.
- Pin Gal A mysterious figure from Marge's past returns to coach her for a bowling tournament.
- Fan-ily Feud Homer publicly disparages a pop singer and faces the ire of her vindictive and highly organized fan army.
- Write Off This Episode When Marge and Lisa start a charity together, Marge is seduced by the money and prestige of Big Charity fundraising.
- The Very Hungry Caterpillars When a plague of insects shuts down Springfield, the Simpsons face their greatest challenge yet… spending time in lockdown with each other.
- Clown v. Board of Education Krusty opens a school for clowning, and it becomes the most successful thing he's ever done.
- Homer's Adventures Through the Windshield Glass Time stands still after Homer crashes his car and flies through the windshield. As his life flashes before his eyes, a magical friend helps Homer learn the secret truth about his marriage.
- Homer's Crossing Feeling worthless at work, Homer volunteers to be a school crossing guard. But when his safety squad receives too much funding, the crossing guards become a force to be feared.
- A Mid-Childhood Night's Dream Marge feels an overwhelming dread of the empty nest.
- McMansion & Wife When a new neighbor showers him with kindness, Homer thinks he's being tricked into buying a sports car at the dealership where the neighbor works - but the truth turns out to be even more sinister; Lisa neutralizes Nelson after he goes on a bullying spree.
- Thirst Trap: A Corporate Love Story In a parody documentary, a young college-dropout CEO embraces the Silicon Valley "fake it until you make it" philosophy and bewitches Mr. Burns into funding her highly dubious dream project.
- Treehouse of Horror XXXIV After Bart is turned into an NFT, Marge fights though the blockchain to rescue her son. To track down a gruesome serial killer, Lisa turns to a murderer from her past. An outbreak transforms Springfielders into a plague of lazy, beer-loving oafs.
- Iron Marge When Marge's heart is broken by a bad birthday present, Bart and Lisa must dig into their mom's past to show that they really know her. Homer becomes a neighborhood fear-monger.
- It's a Blunderful Life Lisa recounts the story of how Homer was scapegoated for a power outage that plunged Springfield into darkness days before Thanksgiving.
- AE Bonny Romance When Groundskeeper Willie is kidnapped to Scotland, Bart and the Simpsons follow - only to discover that what awaits is Homer's worst nightmare.
- Murder, She Boat Lisa must solve a closed-boat mystery when Comic Book Guy's million-dollar action figure is "murdered" on a pop culture cruise.
- Do the Wrong Thing Homer and Bart become kings of the blue-collar sports circuit, but Marge suspects something dishonest at the core of their father-son bond.
- Frinkenstein's Monster Professor Frink secretly helps Homer, through a zoom interview, land a high-level position at a state-of-the-art nuclear plant in Shelbyville. But since Homer lacks the skills to actually perform the job, Frink must monitor Homer's work situation remotely and dictate his every word... causing Frink to fear he's created a monster.
- Lisa Gets an F1 Lisa feels a need for speed as well a need for control of her anxiety when she becomes a pro kid go-cart racer.
- Clan of the Cave Mom A parenting disagreement between Marge and Luann Van Houten escalates into a life-or-death struggle for survival.
- Night of the Living Wage Marge gets a job in a high-pressure ghost kitchen, but when she tries to start a union, she gets more than she (collectively) bargained for.
- Cremains of the Day When someone in Homer's life passes away, he and guys from Moe's go on a road trip to scatter the ashes... but will their friendship die as well?
- The Tell-Tale Pants Marge comes upon a surprising windfall and, angry with Homer, spends it secretly on herself.
- The Tipping Point Homer loses his mind over tipping culture run amok.
- Bart's Brain Bart makes a new friend.
- Bart's Birthday Bart celebrates the most shocking birthday party of his entire life — one that might just change everyone in Springfield forever.
- The Yellow Lotus The Simpsons encounter death on vacation at a high-end resort.
- Desperately Seeking Lisa Lisa has a blazing misadventure in the dark world of Capital City's downtown art scene.
- Shoddy Heat An unearthed corpse opens up a cold case from Springfield in the 1980s… as well as a steamy relationship between young Grampa and Agnes Skinner.
- Treehouse of Horror XXXV Giant monsters created by political rage threaten to tear the town apart, a Victorian Mr. Burns is jump-scared on Thanksgiving by the ghosts of his abused workers, and Homer bonds with a pair of extra-terrestrial jeans in an unforgettable stop-motion adventure that can only be called… Denim.
- Women in Shorts Girls just want to have funny.
- Treehouse of Horror Presents: Simpsons Wicked This Way Comes A tattooed man at a mysterious night circus transports Lisa into three strange stories from the innocent 1950s, the chilling retro-present, and a brutalist future where prestige TV rules the world.
- Convenience Airways The Simpsons are trapped on a flight with the most unruly passengers in America.
- Homer and Her Sisters After a fight in an escape room, Krusty's truth-telling Aunt fixes Homer's relationship with Patty and Selma.
- The Man Who Flew Too Much The new and improved Pin Pals travel to Capital City for their first ever state bowling championship.
- Bottle Episode Marge and Smithers team up to become wine-forging Robin Hoods.
- The Flandshees of Innersimpson Bart dips his toe into the world of celebrity DJ-ing, and Homer finally pushes Flanders too far.
- The Last Man Expanding Springfield becomes hooked on a miracle weight loss drug... all except Homer.
- P.S. I Hate You Marge's "nice-lady" reputation is on the line when an unknown blackmailer threatens to expose the angry woman she is inside.
- Abe League of Their Moe After Grampa and Moe recruit a Macedonian slugger to play in Springfield, it strains their friendship and the very integrity of baseball.
- Stew Lies Homer reinvigorates a celebrity chef's lost passion for food... with some help from the mob.
- Full Heart, Empty Pool Homer and Grampa team up to create a new sport that rivals pickleball, until Homer kicks Grampa off the team.
- Estranger Things When Bart & Lisa stop watching Itchy & Scratchy together, Marge fears that they'll start to drift apart... but she has no idea how bad things are about to get!
- Thrifty Ways to Thieve Your Mother When Lisa starts wearing Marge's "vintage" clothes from the 90's, she's welcomed into the school's super-elite fashion club. But as they run out of retro looks, the funky fashionistas become obsessed with getting more... by hook or by crook.
- Keep Chalm and Gary On Homer gets Superintendent Chalmers a job at the power plant. There, Chalmers discovers huge mutated snails that produce valuable slime launching his new career as a man-o-sphere guru.
- Treehouse of Horror XXXVI Springfield is threatened by a mysterious killer monster emerging from the sewers, Krusty welcomes a demonic guest to his Halloween special, and the action moves a thousand years into the future in a post-apocalyptic, plastic version of the city.
- Men Behaving Manly Springfield's men are in crisis.
- Bad Boys... for Life? Is Bart Simpson truly a bad seed? Homer and Marge must find out once and for good.
- Bart 'N' Frink When Bart becomes Professor Frink's lab assistant, the Simpsons are thrown into a world of tech billionaires determined to live forever, with the future of the internet at stake.
- Sashes to Sashes Bart runs against Mayor Quimby's son for student council president, while Lisa learns troubling secrets about the Quimby clan... and about the Simpsons.
- The Day of the Jack-Up After a mysterious buyer purchases every ticket for the KPOP concert Lisa wants to go to, the Simpsons have to figure out the identity of this evil ticket reseller. Or do they? (Yes, they do).
- Aunt Misbehavin' Patty and Bart team up for the ultimate prank: getting Homer declared legally dead. To their chagrin, Homer loves being officially dead - which leads to Patty and Selma having a huge fight and Patty moving away to "Palm Springfield.
- Guess Who's Coming to Skinner When Principal Skinner discovers that one of his students is a runaway who has been living in the school library, he has to take the snarky, difficult kid into his home and is forced into a role he never expected or wanted - being a parent.
- Parahormonal Activity Set in the near future, Marge is competently coping with the hormonal onslaught hitting her now teenage kids when she's suddenly struck by a big life change of her own, leaving Homer as the last sane person in the house... or is he?
- ¡The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi! Homer revitalizes Bumblebee Man's career when he becomes his secret stuntman. But how much punishment can a Stunt-Bee take before it starts to sting.
- Seperance Homer's enthusiasm skills land him a job at a secretive company with a mind-altering agenda.
- Irrational Treasure [800th episode] Marge's crusade to get the family dog in better shape leads to her entering Santa's Little Helper in canine agility competitions and a trip to the National Dog Show in Philadelphia. There, Marge and Homer suddenly find themselves - and the dog - mixed up in a historical conspiracy adventure worthy of a "National Treasure" movie.
- Homer? A Cracker Bro? Homer strikes up an unlikely friendship with Kirk Van Houten, which leads to them launching a hugely successful business venture together - a "crumbless" cracker that sweeps the nation. But when Kirk's darkest secrets are revealed, Homer has to choose between his family and his fortune... and may just end up going in jail.